Crying over unspilled milk

Crying over unspilled milk

This morning has been unusual. Katie needed a ride to school so I was up early and dressed {well, sort of, if you count lounge pants a sweatshirt and flip flops} I had a to-go-cup of coffee but no breakfast. I hadn’t checked my calendar but I knew it was Friday {cause everyone always knows when it is Friday, right!) and I have been trying to get to my Moms in Prayer meeting at 8:15 am on time lately… one key to that is not going back to sleep after everyone leaves. {yes, I do that! but the time change has helped}. I was excited to see the sunrise shining brightly and burning off the morning fog as we drove to school. My mood was joyful.

After drop off, I did an unheard of thing…I went grocery shopping at 6:45am. We had just run out of half and half and we have been out of milk for a few days. A couple of shocking truths for our household! The first is that I have switched to half and half instead of Coffee-mate Fat Free French Vanilla creamer {my strange addiction for as long as I can remember}. And I believe this is the first time in 19 years that we haven’t had milk in the fridge for more than a few hours. But things have changed since our “milkman” went to college.

So there I was walking through the Kroger when my phone rang and Sean reminded me that it was our son’s birthday and he had just called and woken him up 🙂 I said I would text him and call him later after his classes. I don’t know if it was the realization that I had forgotten what day it was, the fact that I had not made pancakes to put a candle in this year {and wasn’t going to AND I was hungry by now}, or the strange realization that so many things have changed this season but when I pushed my cart to the side to text Jack a cake photo {cause that’s what I do on birthdays} I looked up to see the milk fridge staring at me. I was all alone with this large, orderly, cold, glass wall full of milk. And I really wanted to buy Jack some milk and pour him a glass to go with his “cake”. A sadness washed over me. Alone in the milk aisle. My eyes filled with tears. But my mouth curled up in a smile. The bittersweet moments of Motherhood once again.

I acknowledged my grief in that moment and I felt God’s comfort. A promise of God’s comforting grace that I learned 2 years ago. Matthew 5:4.

And then, I took a photo of the milk and texted it to Jack to go with his virtual cake photo. So much has changed for him the past fews months and I pray he will be blessed with God’s comfort in his times of need.


4 thoughts on “Crying over unspilled milk

  1. You know I shouldn’t be reading stuff like this, since I’m “next in line” to have these moments…:(((
    But, happy birthday to Jack! .. and maybe you and Katie can go get a cupcake after school to celebrate!


  2. Welcome to my world.! Lots of these moments, but as Steve reminds me , so much joy in seeing them succeed in many ways and realize their dreams . Katie will love all the time with mom all to herself , although I’m already warning Brody I will be at everything all the time as my Katie still says I missed half her life. We were lucky to have her home last weekend. It was wonderful.


    • Good to hear from you Amy. Your Katie and I have connected on Facebook recently and I love seeing her posts. So grown up living in NYC but obviously loves her family and her hometown too. My Katie has liked having the time with us but she misses Jack. I have been intentional about enjoying driving her around because I know how it will all change in April when she gets her license. It will be nice to have Jack home for the holidays.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s